A Female Misogynist
Updated: Sep 30, 2021
A female misogynist? Yes. You might be wondering, "how can a woman be a misogynist?" Believe it or not, some women have deep hatred, contempt, and prejudice against their fellow women. Linda Strong-Leek, a professor of Africana Studies and Gender and Sexuality Studies at Haverford College, in an article titled Unbending Gender Narratives in African Literature (2006),says "as an (African) woman, it might be that you have been indoctrinated to envision the world from a patriarchal perspective". This might help us understand why a woman can be misogynistic consciously or subconsciously. Find out how you might be a misogynist.
You question and judge women and girls who have deviated from the whole idea of who and what you believe an ideal “traditional woman” should be. For instance, you judge women who do not want children, do not cook, or perform what are deemed “womanly” activities and duties. Such belief and judgment make you an accomplice to gender-based violence.
You believe if a woman acts as an ideal traditional woman, no harm can come to her. When a woman has been abused by her husband, you say “she must have done something to offend him”, and if she gets raped, you ask “how much did she drink “? Or “what was she wearing”? This kind of mentality promotes a culture of victim-blaming which discourages women from reporting abuse from fear of being judged even by fellow women. As such, promote a culture intoxicated with heinous crimes when these perpetrators get away.
“Women are socialized to believe that if we observe the rules of the patriarchy, its spaces will be kinder to us, or that we will be cared for” Aastha Jani.
You have been unnecessarily hateful towards a fellow woman because you have felt threatened by her beauty, intellect, influence, or money. It is very natural to be threatened by someone, the problem comes in when you become bitter and hostile to a fellow woman. This might lead you into sidelining fellow women in opportunities and choosing to work with men.
If a woman wants to get ahead, the better course is to champion the women around her-Mikaela Kiner.
You believe that “you get along better with boys because girls are toxic”. You take pride in the fact that you only have male friends. You feel superior when boys tell you, you are different from other girls. This is very wrong on so many levels, you have deliberately chosen to judge all women and girls based on one woman or girl. This isn’t fair to every woman out there as a one-character trait cannot be applied to the whole gender.
You shame other girls for dolling up; wearing makeup, doing nails, dressing up, and acting the way they do. This belief makes you think that being girlie means being weak. This mentality convinces you that every successful girl you know made it in life by sleeping with men because no girl can do that. You don’t appreciate a fellow woman’s hard work and downplay her achievements.
Now that you know you are guilty of one or more of those things, what are you willing to do about it?